I’m having one of those days…

Today is a bad day. A very bad day. I can feel it. I can’t think straight, I’m feeling agitated and frustrated all of the time. I’m worrying far too much about silly things that I shouldn’t even be worrying about.

I cried today because a friend I haven’t spoken to in a while invited me over Facebook out for her birthday meal. There weren’t that many people invited and I just burst into tears because I was. It made me feel special for once and I cried because I very rarely feel like that anymore. Continue reading

First Dates

First dates are scary. I have one tonight and I’m so nervous, it’s unreal. I can’t even remember my last first date; I don’t even know if my ex and I actually had a first date. That’s quite a sad thought, really. But tonight is one and I don’t know what to do with myself until then.

I have butterflies going in my stomach and my head is telling me that I should just cancel and put myself out of this misery. But that’s just cowardly and I couldn’t be so mean.

I can do this. It will be fun… hopefully.

More Tears.

I know I must sound like stuck record right now but this is literally the only place I can express my feelings.Β 

I also know that expressing my feelings over social media isn’t necessarily the most wisest of choices either, but then I literally have nowhere and no one to release my anger and frustration onto. I can’t keep emotion bottled up unlike when I was younger (even then it didn’t do me any good) so I need to be able to get it off my chest and out in the open by whatever means necessary.

I can’t talk to people about how I’m feeling because, from experience, they just tell you to suck it up and deal with it. This is does not help me in any way shape or form. It just makes things worse. It lowers any form of self confidence and trust I have and shatters it to tiny pieces.Β  Continue reading

Dissertation

I currently have 8,344 words written for my Dissertation. Technically, that means I am within my minimum 10% bracket band. HAPPY DAYS! Just a conclusion left to go and I AM DONE!!! Well, at least I’ll have a completed first draft…